Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Rules

Josh left yesterday to go back home for two weeks. Saying goodbye to him was probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. It is already had being here, but now having to do this on my own, without Josh will be harder. I am praying for the time to go quickly.

It is very difficult going to the orphanage for 4 hours a day with not much to entertain your child. Some people have these amazing pictures on their blog of play rooms with toys. Can you believe it! They a actually have toys or even a room to play with their child in, but not here. We have the main hallway to play in. And they have so many rules here. The most ridiculous rule, is not being able to sit on the floor. It makes it really hard to bond with your child when you can't just sit down and play with them. Then, yesterday, one of the nannies tried to get us to take some shoes for Kaylee, we had already tried on the 2 pair they gave us for her, one was too big and the other too small, so then they told us we can't let her feet touch the ground with just slippers on. Luckily, I remembered the shoes I brought for her. So, then today, I got in trouble twice for letting the kids do things they shouldn't. The first was letting Kaylee touch the curtains, I thought it would be good for her to experience different textures, but some lady yelled at me for it. Then a few minutes later another lady yelled at Justus for standing on the couch. I already felt on guard with being watched, now I will have to be extra careful. I look forward to going home and just sitting on the floor. I still don't even know if Kaylee can crawl.

When we first got here, there was this little kid in Kaylee's class that I was sure was Quinton, it turns out, she is a girl ( sorry Carol, still haven't seen him, he must be in a different group). Anyway, she is so adorable. I think she must be older than Kaylee, but even more delayed, because as far as I can tell, she can't even sit up. She and Kaylee share the same play crib. I asked her name, they said Sonya. I was planning on asking Marina more about her and why she is not listed on Reece's Rainbow. I have been thinking the last few days, that if I can convince Josh :), I want to come back for her ( as much as I never want to come back, I will). Anyway, today when we took Kaylee back to her class, this lady came in, the nannies gave Sonya to her. She was crying so hard, I couldn't help but cry as well. I asked if she was the mom, they said yes. This just breaks my heart, because you can clearly tell she loves her child, greatly. But, it is just not accepted here to raise a child with DS. The saddest thing, no matter how much she loves her child, or how much she visits her, she will still have to live her life in an institution. I am still going to ask about her.


Justus giving Kaylee a hug.

8 comments:

  1. Hey Crystal - You guys have been on my mind non-stop. Praying for you all. I just can't imagine how hard this is for you, but the smile on Kaylee's face just has to give you the warmest feeling. She is going to be such a little blessing to you guys, as you all will be to her as well. Sending lots of love & prayers your way... ~Jen & Jonathan

    ReplyDelete
  2. My heart breaks for all those in the orphanages and institutions. We are trying to do something here. Prayers are going out for all of you especially your time there without Josh. Being there will help Kaylee get adjusted to her family though. Praying for the Judge also.

    I wonder if the reason you can't (or just don't want to) sit on the floor is the same as it is here that it is just plain nasty because dogs pee and poop everywhere outside and you end up walking on it over the years it has been happening so you just don't sit on the ground? I tried researching it for the Ukraine but haven't found the answer yet. Will they let you put down a big blanket and play with her then?

    Kaylee is so worth this effort. We are praying praying praying! love you so much. You are such a beautiful hearted mom!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Breaks my heart :( Noone can ever be the same after adopting and seeing the children at the orphanage. Praying for God to strengthen and help you while your husband is away and you wait for court. God bless you!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Crystal, I had dreams all last night that seemed to go on for hours on end of being in a courtroom with your family. It was the weirdest dreams, I hope and pray that you can come home quickly. We are praying for you everyday!

    ReplyDelete
  5. i'm sorry crystal! that is hard but i know His grace is sufficient and really soon you'll be home playing on the floor.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi Crystal :) Thanks so much for looking for Quinton. I hope you get to see him. My heart just needs to know that he is doing ok. We prayed for your family and for the Hagler's at church on Sunday and we prayed for the judge's heart-that he/she would see your loving families and know that allowing them to be adopted is the right thing to do. Hang in there. We will keep praying and soon Kaylee will be an orphan no more!

    ReplyDelete
  7. These trials will work out perseverance. The kind that rescues Kaylee and others from life as an orphan.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am so sorry I am just now getting on here! I have been thinking of you and praying for all of you since I last talked to Josh. I know you will all end up happy in all of this. It will just take patience! Do you still have a nanny with you?

    She is absolutely beautiful! I can't wait for her to be here, with her family, being loved everyday. Will stay up to date now that I am on here.

    Love you all! **HUGS**

    ReplyDelete