Monday, August 23, 2010

Why we are adopting

Crystal's story:
 Last week, I read an article in Above Rubies magazine, the article talked about adopting international children with down syndrome. I looked up the website they gave, which was Reece's Rainbow. I did not look it up because we were interested in adopting, I was just curious as to what it was all about. As soon as I opened the website, I saw the scripture proverbs 24:12. When I read it, my first thought was, " I should not have read that". When I am convicted about something, I have to follow through with it. I still did not think I would really fall in love with any of the children, but I did. 
 The moment I saw Priscilla's face, I just knew she was ours. I don't really know how to explain it. I showed her to Josh, as I was doing that, I noticed her birthday was only two days after Justus'. This may seem silly, but I felt like that was a sign that she was ours. When I was pregnant with Justus, I really wanted twins, a boy and a girl. When I found out it wasn't twins, I said, we could adopt another little baby the same age as Justus and raise them as twins.
 I could not stop thinking about her for days. I was obsessed with these precious little ones, especially her. All I could think about was her, I couldn't even sleep at night. 
 I talked to Josh about it, and at first he did not feel anything for her, but said he would pray about it.  The next day, I sent him an email with her picture, titled our daughter. He wasn't especially thrilled about that, but still prayed about it. Since he wasn't on board with it, I prayed and asked the Lord to take away my deep desire to have her. Later in the day, I was watching Praise Baby with the kids and there was a down syndrome child on there. It broke my heart to think that I could not have Priscilla when all I wanted was to be her mommy.
 I asked God how we could even do it, because it is very costly. He showed me that $25,000 is like 25 cents to him, and that He alone is faithful. He showed me that He can and will supply all my needs according to His riches in Glory.   I knew what the answer was, and knew I did not have to even pray about whether we do it, but to start praying that Josh's heart would be open to it. 
 We prayed together. Instead of Josh saying if we adopt her, he started saying when we adopt her. He even brought it up to one of his friends, and asked him to pray. Then we started talking about how we could do it, and if we could really do it. 
 We went out on a date, exactly a week after I first saw Priscilla's picture, I could not even get through dinner without crying several times. I could not imagine her living her life without someone to love her.  Earlier in the day, I read a blog of a down syndrome girl who died at 23 with Leukemia in the arms of her mom and dad. If we adopted her, and she later died, it would be so worth it. Worth it, for her to know love. Worth it, for us to have given love. 
 I was willing to lay it all down if Josh said to. Of course, I would not have given up on Priscilla, I couldn't. I would have done everything possible to find her a family. 
 The next thing Josh said was, " so what do we need to do to adopt her?" Those were the sweetest words I have heard. 

Josh's story:
Not long after Crystal and I met, somehow we discussed our desire to someday foster children. This common, God-given desire is actually one of the things that cemented our relationship. It was our belief that we would someday be able to care for children who had no one else to care for them. Our intent was to do our very best at loving these children no matter their circumstances and no matter the difficulties that they might present to us. We also believed that it was very likely we would adopt at least some of these children as our own.

Fast forward five-and-a-half years: two children of our own and many scattered discussions and prayers about fostering over those years. When would be the right time? When would be the best time? When would God want us to do this? The “right” time seemed far off, maybe after our children were starting to become teenagers. Maybe sooner, but certainly not right now, right?

When Crystal first brought up Priscilla, my heart and mind were still latched onto the timing not being right. As I saw the pictures, and read the stories, and prayed, I was reminded of the charge of James to “care for orphans and widows in their distress” (James 1:27). Some translations say to visit them, but when I recite this verse in my mind, I have always said “care for.” As I pondered all that Crystal had told me about the ministry and the orphanages and Priscilla, and as I prayed for guidance, God opened my eyes just a little bit more so that I could see that this charge is really not optional. Realizing this blew away the concerns about timing.

Further down my road of thoughts, of late, I have been critical of myself for being lousy at living out the charge of Christ to go and make disciples. The opportunities to share my faith with co-workers generally intimidates me. Though I’ve grown to be a little bolder in this environment, I’ve become discouraged with myself. I have prayed about this asking for continued opportunities and the courage to speak up when those opportunities come up. I believe God has shown me in my heart that every believer’s call to disciple will play out differently. Though I struggle to share my faith with co-workers, I have not experienced that intimidation when teaching my daughter about Jesus. Though she is still young and often does not understand what I teach her, she is an open canvas ready to be filled with all the things of God. She is excited to learn and I am eager to help fill her with the things of God. When I realized that I do well with teaching my own daughter and again considered Priscilla, I saw that we may be Priscilla’s only chance to learn of the richness of a life filled with God. If God will make all of the provision to adopt her, financial and otherwise, how can we not step up and seize the opportunity to bless this little girl with the love of God and the opportunity to help her come to know Him deeply?

1 comment:

  1. WOW! i really can't express with words how this impacted me. i really look up to y'all and am praying your little girl will be home soon. love you guys!